John Gray,author of Men are from Mars and women are from Venus is according to me GURU of making relationships work.Relations are quite complicated and everyone have their own view and way to handle it.Nobody wants to hear that the way he\she is handling any relation be it with his\her wife,mother or father is wrong.But if we are ready to hear the truth which I think we all should be this book will offer remedy to all your He doesn't care and She is never happy woes.Sadly book will only help in improving mostly your relation with your spouses.But that's no less too.Considering hectic lifestyle of both men and women.They get only few hours with eachother.For some they spend it fighting-You don't care and You can never be happy,some working(they don't want to face accusations of eachother so they bury themselves with work pretending that there is no problem-mostly men while female loves to crib and feel sorry for herself),some taking care of their children(romance is over responsibility is in).All this leads to personal dissatisfaction and detachment.You want happiness and if you don't get it at home you search elsewhere.For some it's love of work,while some party out and feel less lonely(atleast that's what they pretend they are feeling),while others and a major percentage look for other companion who will listen to him/her and understand.Divorce is no longer an unknown term.Relations are breaking apart.This leads to a cycle.The other person listens in the beginning but that is only till you both are in beginning phase of the relation and then its again back to accusation,unsatisfaction and finally the search for somebody who UNDERSTANDS.This makes you ask yourself is there something wrong with you that you don't have a successful relation.That's where knowing the cause rather then worrying about the after effect helps.
According to Gray, a woman relieves stress by talking about it, which the man may interpret as an accusation or request for a solution. In terms of woman (or Venusian language) it is just sharing a problem which she wants to be acknowledged. The man on the other hand has a basic instinct to give a solution because Martians (that is, men) do not discuss a problem unless they want a solution.
This can become a bone of contention between a husband and wife because he jumps in with his answer and she interprets this as an undue interruption and makes her feel as if she's not being listened to. The author suggests that this conflict can be avoided if the man understands this situation and silently listens rather than offer a solution. Once she has been heard she will become de-stressed and normalized.
On the other hand, just listening to a man will be similarly frustrating for him, because he's asking for your advice, not your sympathy. The woman needs to understand this and offer practical advice rather than just being sympathetic.
Monday, April 16, 2007
MBA Aspirants will simply love it!
I recently visited this cool site http://www.ibsrocks.com
Though it's an IBS community yet it's a must see for all MBA aspirants as you'll get all the info from how to where to when...Check it out...
Though it's an IBS community yet it's a must see for all MBA aspirants as you'll get all the info from how to where to when...Check it out...
Life@Chennai..
Being away from home does two things to you.You become self dependent and you realise the importance of a family.It has been more then four years since I am away from people I love the most 'My Parents'.
Life is making mistake each day and learning from it.That's what I have learnt.
When I was in Delhi,that is about few months back,I always thought that life couldn't get worse...Doing something I didn't have passion for 'M.Sc Statistics' and staying alone had taken a total toll on me and I had reduced to a mere complaining self.Then came the day when I stepped in Chennai.I am not saying Chennai is a bad place to be in but it was just not my cup of tea.I found more things to complain about.Everyday I used to bicker about the place,humidity,people,lifestyle...You name it I got it.Life was getting worser...I used to ask God everyday 'What did I ever do to You?'.But He never answered.But then I realized that I should not complain as probability of Him answering me is quite low about 1/6,525,170,264 as estimated on July 2006.Yeah,you heard it write I am from Statistics background.Though I never fell in love with the subject yet it follows me like a faithful dog everywhere.So the first thing I learnt-Life can always get worse.No limits to that.So I won't say be happy and satisfied in today as I am not.But what I can say is bickering and rasing your b.p. doesn't help anyone except your doctor ofcourse.So made this blog today and appropriately called it 'QUE SERA SERA'-What will be,will be..Hope to keep posting everyday...with my Life@Chennai
Life is making mistake each day and learning from it.That's what I have learnt.
When I was in Delhi,that is about few months back,I always thought that life couldn't get worse...Doing something I didn't have passion for 'M.Sc Statistics' and staying alone had taken a total toll on me and I had reduced to a mere complaining self.Then came the day when I stepped in Chennai.I am not saying Chennai is a bad place to be in but it was just not my cup of tea.I found more things to complain about.Everyday I used to bicker about the place,humidity,people,lifestyle...You name it I got it.Life was getting worser...I used to ask God everyday 'What did I ever do to You?'.But He never answered.But then I realized that I should not complain as probability of Him answering me is quite low about 1/6,525,170,264 as estimated on July 2006.Yeah,you heard it write I am from Statistics background.Though I never fell in love with the subject yet it follows me like a faithful dog everywhere.So the first thing I learnt-Life can always get worse.No limits to that.So I won't say be happy and satisfied in today as I am not.But what I can say is bickering and rasing your b.p. doesn't help anyone except your doctor ofcourse.So made this blog today and appropriately called it 'QUE SERA SERA'-What will be,will be..Hope to keep posting everyday...with my Life@Chennai
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